(network) don't tell me you're too blind to see it

[demonicmiracle]

Who: Crowley
Username: killerqueen
Warnings: this is exactly what you think it is


[Sometimes a demon wakes up on April Fools and decides to be an asshole.]

Just found out some unbelievable shit about the ADI

You'll wanna watch this

Click here

Comments

Text, un: Chosewell

[failedpromise]

(Somewhere, Cortana snorts.)

Wow. I'd call that nostalgic, except I'm pretty sure that meme stopped circulating centuries before I was born.

[demonicmiracle]

Well that's tragic, I'd have thought Astley would be eternal

[failedpromise]

Maybe if you're into 5 centuries old music.

Or if you contain the sum of all Human knowledge in your databases.

(Hey Crowley have you ever wanted to interact with a sassy, boastful AI?)

[demonicmiracle]

[Uh yes of course.]

Nothing wrong with five centuries old music, although I could do without hearing another hymn ever in my life

Are they kidnapping robots now?

[failedpromise]

Not the religious sort?

Personally, I could do without flip music. (Yes, there really is a genre of music called that in the Halo future.)

A.I., actually. I don't have a robotic body.

[demonicmiracle]

Not in that sense, no

[Does he count as the religious sort in that he was literally made by God? The jury is still out.]

That's a bummer. Did they give you one here at least?

And you've got to explain flip music now, since you brought it up

[failedpromise]

Actually, here I have a solid hologram.

(It's a ghost body, but she refuses to acknowledge this.)

It's a genre of music descended from what you'd probably know as metal. It was popular in dance clubs in the 2520s.

(She's actually not too bothered by flip music, but there are other genres she likes better. Also the chief really wasn't a fan and when you're listening to music while hanging out in someone else's head...)

[demonicmiracle]

Please tell me there's an H on your head

[The AI from the future isn't gonna get your stupid Red Dwarf references, Crowley.]

Metal dance music certainly sounds fun. Not sure I'd be into it, personally, but taste is subjective

[failedpromise]

Sorry, but no.

(Why would she want that in her design? People used to have the weirdest ideas of the future.)

Most people I've met don't like it, though I did know someone who was into it once.

[demonicmiracle]

Disappointing

A bit discordant, I imagine?

[failedpromise]

I'd send you a sound file, but for some reason I really don't feel like connecting directly to the network right now.

(Not with the talk about malware. She can fend off basically any virus, but that doesn't mean she wants to dip her toes in a sewer.)

[demonicmiracle]

Can't blame you for that, who knows what sorts of things people could get up to

[failedpromise]

People like you, you mean?

[demonicmiracle]

[failedpromise]

Sure buddy.

And let me guess: You've got a bridge to sell me while you're at it?

[demonicmiracle]

Nah, that's ridiculous. What do I have is a connection with a Nigerian prince who needs just a little help getting access to his fortune

[failedpromise]

And let me guess, if I just send a few hundred bucks-likely giving out my credit card number in the process-I can get a cut.

Sure, I'll bite. Here you go: 469226883825968

(It's an obvious ploy, and sure enough, if you match the numbers with letters on an old phone keypad, the fake card number spells out "how about fuck you".)

[demonicmiracle]

[Bold of Cortana to assume he's even going to bother trying.]

I'll need the expiration date and CVC code too, ta

[failedpromise]

(Oh come on. Fine, she'll go for something easier, then.)

420, 06/09.