Log | July Catch-all | Open

[edalyn]

Who: Edalyn Clawthorne + maybe you!
When: Throughout July
Where: Around Gloucester + the ADI
Summary: Eda helps with a Christmas party, has a bad experience with candy, checks out the Wolfe seal, and fights geese. Eda also starts to look increasingly tired and miserable.
Warnings: arachnophobia, body horror (including one instance that isn’t but potentially looks like self harm), animal attacks, possible harm to geese, supernaturally induced depression/anxiety/loneliness, mental/physical health degradation, emotional breakdowns

Holly Jolly

a) It's finally happened.

This place has officially broken her down.

Edalyn Clawthorne has compromised the last of her remaining standards.

Because she used to draw the line at novelty costumes.

Unfortunately for her, Pam looked sad. And Eda may or may not feel just a little bad about stealing certain access codes. So here she is, delivering people little gifts that she really, really hopes aren't cursed. Someone is going to have a hell of a lot to answer for if they're cursed. But it's fine. Probably.

She's also dressed like an elf. And, perhaps more notably, in witch form. While she's been trying to avoid unnecessary magic, sometimes she has to burn some power off. And since it seems that's going to get her in less trouble than it used to, she's decided she could use a break from having to duck under every doorframe.

Which means she also looks, more or less, like an elf. With a long fluffy weasel tail. It seems that she's stuck with that whatever she does. At least there are worse fates—she’s pretty sure she makes it work.

Perhaps you catch her in the act of dropping a little gift off for you, or perhaps you simply pass her in the hallway and get a look that dares you to say something.

b) The fact she’s still dressed this way later, at the actual party, is less Pam’s fault and more Raine’s. They insisted she should participate in the local customs. And also bribed her about it. Unfortunately, she’s weaker to their charms than she’d like to admit.

Which leaves Eda, still dressed like an elf, eating whatever a roast beef pizza is, and looking deeply awkward in this restaurant. If nothing else, the decorations are fun–she likes the shiny objects, at least. And might be caught batting at a plastic icicle like a cat once or twice.

Her own ‘gift’ is sitting on the table near her as she eats; a tiny mechanical ornament of an old bearded man who appears to be fishing. She assumes it’s festive for some reason that would make sense to a human. If it has a matching partner, she doesn’t know what that would look like.

A New Spin
cw: arachnophobia, body horror

Given the incident with the chocolates, Eda should probably realise that it’s a bad idea to eat unattended candy around the ADI.

But she’s also been getting most of her sweets–and the occasional cooking ingredients as well–from Bumble Gum for months. The shop may have strangely mixed opinions from the humans, but she’s yet to find anything supernatural about it. In fact, it’s nice to finally have some food that wouldn’t be out of place on the Boiling Isles.

And if there’s often something just slightly spiteful in the way she crunches down on candied spiders, in particular, well, that’s just a little bonus. They’ve simply become a creature that she’s less fond of since getting here.

Either way, she’s hardly thinking when she idly begins popping fried, sugar-coated spiders into her mouth. She’s entirely surprised by the sudden feeling of more limbs than she normally has.

When she looks down, even turning around trying to see her whole back, she doesn’t see anything. Even when she tries to move the phantom limbs and feels them move. She’s on the ADI grounds, so it isn’t a matter of glamour. But whatever it is, she doesn't like it. She slowly puts down the rest of the spiders with a slightly shaky breath.

Murderous Geese
cw: animal attacks, possible harm to animals

Eda tends to spend a lot of time in or near the woods—the ones that aren’t part of Dogtown at any rate.

By now, much of the local wildlife knows to avoid her in much the same way they avoid free-roaming cats. She’s a menace and, at this point, ultimately a fact of life.

Some things are braver, of course. She’s used to getting yelled at by various birds.

The loud hissing still startles her, though. Even for geese, the flock stepping into her path seem especially bold. She’s relatively sure they’re unusually toothy for Human Realm birds, too.

She hisses back. This can only end well.

Accidental Archaeologists
Eda’s last visit to Hammond Castle wasn’t exactly a great time, and she’s definitely planning to give any taxidermy she happens to see a wide berth.

But on the other hand, she’s a little worried about people digging up anything Dogtown related, especially after the rash of artifact incidents. Wolves have been a running theme around here, too. Even if it’s spelled a bit differently from the towns.

Eda can be found with her nose near the glass of the new display, peering suspiciously at the wax seal.

A Breakdown

i. my nerves are wrecked and coming unwound
cw: supernaturally induced depression/anxiety/loneliness, mental/physical health degradation

Anyone who knows Eda particularly well may start to notice something by the mid-point of July. Even people who only know her in passing may start to notice by the end of the month.

In short, she doesn’t look good.

She starts to seem worn, unusually tired. Then again, that could be said about a lot of ADI employees in the wake of recent revelations and missions.

The circles under her eyes become more noticeable over time, like she’s not sleeping well or as often as she should—or perhaps simply not getting enough rest even if she does.

At first, she actually seems slightly more talkative. Willing to engage and spend time with people more often than is usually characteristic for the oft-prickly woman, even now that she’s made friends here.

There’s an almost desperate edge to the way she grasps at connection.

And then, eventually, that changes.

Eda becomes more withdrawn, and more secretive. Notably anxious, and quick to insist that she’s fine in a way that she’s been, until recently, learning to stop doing.

ii. does everybody have it together or are we all pretending?
cw: prev + emotional breakdowns

At some point, you might spot her suddenly breaking down in tears, when she thinks there’s no one around to see it.

Huddled behind a building, or perhaps a shelf in the archives, if she thinks everyone else in research has gone home for the day. Nothing in particular seems to set her off, as much as she just… in the middle of whatever else she was doing, cracks.

She sinks to the ground and buries her face in her arms, muttering something that sounds a lot like I can’t keep doing this.

iii. i rip myself apart at the seams / i find one weak spot and start unraveling
cw: prev + mild body horror, not actually self harm but could appear that way

Or, perhaps, you catch her doing something that might or might not be more concerning to most people.

Eda seems distant as she idly picks one of her hands apart, joint by joint.

The segments separate cleanly, bloodlessly, with little pops. She doesn’t react like there’s any pain when she does it. Despite the nature of what she’s doing, her mannerisms appear more like an anxious habit than anything else; akin to fidgeting, just in the strangest possible way.

Watch long enough without disturbing her, and she’ll start putting it back together, reassembling her fingers with a practiced ease.

Comments

Breakdown ii

[failedpromise]

Look, Cortana is having her own issues right now, but she can still worry about her friends; AI are good at multitasking like that.

...Also crying behind a shelf at work is a really obvious sign that something is wrong.

"Edalyn? ...You alright?"

[edalyn]

Eda makes a small startled noise and immediately regrets letting things get to her when she wasn't sure she'd be alone. She swipes the back of a hand accross her eyes quickly and scrambles to her feet.

Unfortunately, while she likes Cortana, she doesn't trust Cortana. Not with this—something that could get her kicked out of the ADI or worse. Especially not given the AI's thoughts on magic, even when it doesn't come directly from a cursed artifact.

"I'm fine," she says, despite all evidence.

"...Allergies." Which was possibly the absolute least convincing excuse she could have given. But maybe Cortana would take the hint.

[failedpromise]

Cortana frowns and puts her hands on her hips. "You know, I get not wanting to talk but I'm honestly insulted you thought I'd buy that."

Really, Eda. Allergies?

She sighs, and goes to grab a box of tissues.

[edalyn]

"...Fine, gimme a minute and I'll come up with a better one." Eda doesn't sound terribly surprised Cortana doesn't buy it, though she doesn't actually apologise either. If she wasn't so tired maybe she'd have had something better to begin with.

But then again, does it really matter? Does anyone actually care?

By the time Cortana gets back, Eda looks at least a little bit more more put together, or at least the recent crying is less obvious.

Geese

[worthallthis]

Winter takes long walks around Gloucester, including around Dogtown or near the woods around the town. He's seen Eda out here before, so he's not surprised to see her. He pauses at the hissing from the geese, though, giving them a wary look before glancing back at Eda, in case she's done something to agitate them, or needs protection even if she didn't.

Not that Eda probably needs protection either way. She's pretty good at taking care of herself. But still.

"Maybe don't hiss, back," he suggests.

[edalyn]

While most of Eda's attention is focused on the geese, her ears twitch as she hears larger footsteps. So she's not entirely surprised when someone comments, though she hadn't looked to see who it was.

"They started it," she points out, glancing over. She says this fairly mildly; so far, they haven't done anything but hiss in an especially aggressive way. Nor does she want to acknowledge that hissing at geese is anything but normal.

Her response would often be to do more than hiss, but that would be if she didn't have company.

The geese, meanwhile, notice a second person and begin to hiss at Winter as well.

[worthallthis]

Winter gives the geese a little glare, but then pointedly ignores them. "Maybe. But animals around here aren't always what they seem. We've had aggressive birds. Kind of a lot, actually." Is there a specific entity that just loved birds that likes to scare people here, or are birds just popular with a lot of them? Easy to manipulate or emulate or something? Winter doesn't know.

[edalyn]

“Yeah, seems like it," Eda agrees. Both about the animals in general, and the birds. Those seagulls were pretty pushy, among other incidents.

"I mean, I have to take you folks' word this isn't just what animals are like here. They're still pretty tame compared to the isles."

Not that any of that is a reason she shouldn't hiss back at the geese, in her mind at least. It might be more reason she should, all things considered. Then again, it may not make much difference one way or the other, because it's about now that at least one of the birds decides to charge.

breakdown iii.

[ruevealing]

"Eda!"

This long in Gloucester and Rue is getting quite accustomed to seeing little horrors like this play out in front of them. It's been the usual go to for some months now, being dragged around by ADI and it's involvement in such supernatural dread, but seeing her friend at the source of it still sends a shock through their system. It's an awful sight to behold, Eda idly harming herself like this, looking so far off in thought as ligament are torn through, bloodlessly separating her own fingers.

Rue's great paw scoops up the woman's other hand, commanding her attention.

"Your poor hand, Eda. What is this?"

[edalyn]

Normally, Eda would have noticed someone getting this close; as it is, her ears don't even move until Rue grabs her hand.

At which point she lets out a tiny startled squeak and drops the finger she was holding. It rolls a few inches across the library table she was sitting at as she looks up.

Her expression is more awkward than anything else, although she certainly feels at least a little bad about making them worry.

"Rue—uh. There's no poor anything. My hand is fine," she begins. There's a slight, unpleasant sense of déjà vu as she realises how much that sounds like every time she brushed things off as everything's normal. But it is true in this case.

"It's a fun side effect of the curse," she adds, not that that explains why she was doing it. "Doesn't hurt or nothing." She tacks on that last bit almost too quickly, realising she doesn't want them to get the wrong idea.

[ruevealing]

"Fine!?"

Rue's response is immediate to that claim, rudely cutting off Eda's explanation as her very own finger rolls around across the table, leaving the owlbear gasping.

But just as she promises, it really is fine, just the same kind of party trick that they'd see back in the Feywild, but seeing it here in the Mortal Realm is significantly more distressing. Rue releases Eda's hand, their broad, feathery shoulders drooping briefly as the tension drops from them.

"You terrified me, I was so certain you were hurt."

[edalyn]

Eda lets out a little sigh. Anyone else, and she'd probably laugh at least a bit over the chance to upset them by being weird, even unintentionally. But Rue is so genuine with their concern that she regrets it, even if she tries to brush the whole thing off.

"Well... I'm not," she says, beginning to snap the pieces back together with little clicks.

"It's part of the curse," she adds, since they cut her off before, "one of the more fun side effects if I'm honest." Though she didn't exactly look like she was having fun before. Just not in pain.

"I just... I just do it while I'm thinking, sometimes." A habit she'd broken for a while, especially here where displays of magic are such a big deal, but a habit nonetheless.

[unnecessaryflourishes]

Emet-Selch will be the first to admit that he might not know Eda particularly well. Not outside of a handful of interactions, at the very least. In fact, it's very nearly coincidence that has him passing by when he does, only for him to stop to make sure he really is seeing what he's seeing. True, the fact that her hand is coming apart remarkably cleanly for someone he would have assumed to be flesh and blood is unusual, but he's at least no stranger to a variety of reasons things might not be quite what they seem.

That said, he can't help but speak up all the same.

"I take it that would be something normal for you?"

CW: body horror

[edalyn]

Eda is lost in thought to the point that she doesn't notice the man until he does speak up. She does her best to hide the fact she's startled.

His question gets a genuine if tired laugh, albeit partly at the expense of someone having to see her be weird. While she didn't actually intend to have someone notice, she might as well lean into the chance to be just a little obnoxious.

"Sure is," she agrees, glancing up and then back down.

She makes a point of flexing her detached hand where it lays on the table in front of her, before beginning to take the next to last finger apart. Click, pop, click.

Oddly, she does appear to be flesh and blood. Or at least flesh and visible bones. The flesh simply doesn't bleed.

"Why," she asks, glancing back up, "how do you clean your bones?" She tilts her head and raises an eyebrow, doing her best impression of innocent confusion.

[unnecessaryflourishes]

The urge to be obnoxious is something Emet-Selch also has a fair amount of experience with. Some of personal even, though he's hardly about to say anything about it. Or about her display, for that matter. Oh, he recognizes it for what it is, but the expression on his face doesn't change much from 'mildly interested curiosity'. As if he's more interested in trying to categorize the effect rather than bothered by how anything should happen to look.

"I would not have needed to. Prior to my arrival here, the body I inhabited was not my own. Had I needed to find one more suitable in any aspect it would have been trivial to lay claim to another instead."

As, indeed, he often had.

"Why, then, should I have sought to care over much for any given set of mortal flesh?"

[edalyn]

Well, whatever response Eda is expecting, it's not that one. She might be a little disappointed in the lack of response, but she has to admit she's a little intrigued. And possibly respects the choice to be weird back, but that remains to be seen.

"I guess body swapping would make that easier," she admits, in a tone that implies that doing such is a normal thing. Which, to be fair, she used to be able to.

"But getting used to new ones is weird," she adds, wrinkling her nose, "I'm kind of attached to mine. And I'm pretty sure most people are too—they don't usually like when you keep them." You know, if you're the sort of person who cares about that.

Breakdown ii- BARD FEELS BAD :(

[rainestorms]

Raine would recognise the sound of Eda crying anywhere. It wasn't something they were happy to be familiar with, but decades of struggle turned it into something that they couldn't forget. It struck them like a knife- painful, and the fatal twist was that they knew it was their fault.

ii Bard is sad :(

[rainestorms]

Raine would recognise the sound of Eda crying anywhere. It wasn't something they were happy to be familiar with, but decades of struggle turned it into something that they couldn't forget. It struck them like a knife- painful, and the fatal twist was that they knew it was their fault.

Raine had, earlier, decided to use the medallion a little earlier than normal to sweep around research. They were watching whomever and looking at whatever they until they decided to snoop around a storage room. They even checked Eda's desk, and though it's empty they grab a notepad off their desk, and leave her a little note on hers.

You're my favourite note! It read, and they even signed it at the bottom. They smile at their silly pun for good measure, but they quickly go back to what their task at hand. Their endless search through old ADI files and papers, for something to make sense of things.

That's when Raine heard Eda. They gasped, audibly, and their hand instinctually clapped over their mouth as if Eda could've heard them.

Raine puzzled for a moment about how to communicate with her. Touching Eda was out of the question. She couldn't hear their voice. So they slunk back to the offices, pulled the note off of the notepad, and returned to Eda with the notepad and a pencil in hand.

Raine hesitated for a moment, though. They didn't want to scare Eda, so they decide to crouch down, and gently knock knock knock on the bookshelf next to her, before they placed the notepad between them and wrote:

Eda.. I think it's time to stop. I'm sorry it's made you cry like this.

Eda's sad her bard is sad :(

[edalyn]

Eda startled noticeably, regardless of their intentions. While she was certainly getting used to the fact they were often invisible, she hadn't wanted anyone to see her like this; and sudden noises were generally a bad thing in this place at the best of times.

She started to say something, before the notepad confirmed who it was. She relaxed somewhat, but she wasn't exactly happy it was Raine.

She hadn't wanted to make them worry, or feel bad. She'd been trying to keep this up, focusing on the fact that nothing the medallion made her feel was real. Doing her best not to make them feel worse about something she'd only agreed to but volunteered for.

She swiped a sleeve across her eyes and made an attempt to look more put together, but she was quiet for a moment after reading the note.

"It's not..." she might have been going to say their fault, but that wasn't entirely true. There wasn't much point in trying to say she was fine, either.

"I know what I signed up for. It's just been—it's just been lasting longer lately."

Lasting longer and feeling worse. Eating away at her in a way she'd thought she could handle. A dull ache of loneliness that was hitting the point where it never quite left. Where it reminded her far too much of other parts of her life.

She wanted to hold Raine. She hated knowing that would make it worse.

"Do you... really think you're onto something?"

[rainestorms]

I do. They wrote back, but as they contemplated everything she'd just said, and found themself more upset. More scared for what the grand scheme of things meant for both themself and Eda. Raine shook their head, and continued writing.

None of it is what I've expected. Some of it I didn't even mean to find, but it's made me see the danger is more on our doorsteps than I'd realised. It's starting to feel a lot like home... And not in a good way.

Another pause. They didn't want to ignore Eda's earlier statement. They couldn't.

But, Eda. I think I need to find somebody else to feed the medallion. I know you know what you signed up for. I know you're strong, but I'm worried about you. You look sad, and sick. You're crying at work. I don't want you to do that anymore.

[edalyn]

Eda's feelings were mixed as she read Raine's message. On the one hand, it helped to feel like they were getting somewhere, like this was all for something. But on the other, that meant more reason to keep doing it... not to mention the fact that she wasn't happy to hear things were looking worse than they'd thought.

The next part made her feel mixed emotions, too. She was glad Raine didn't want to see her doing badly, but a part of her wished she was hiding it better. And while she couldn't do this forever, she still felt like she might be the safest option.

She suspected it wouldn't actually make Raine feel better to point out that this very much wasn't the first time she'd gotten overwhelmed and cried at work, here. That had been happening now and then since long before the medallion was involved. Albeit not as often.

"I think... maybe. Or maybe we take a break," because she couldn't deny needing that much. "But I don't—do you think there's anyone else we can trust enough?"

Hunter wasn't an option on any level. Rue might have been, had they not been doing so badly with Hob's absence, but Eda still wouldn't have liked the idea. Manji might be worth talking to... but she wasn't sure if there was anyone who was a good idea.

~Invisible Wildcard~ Early July

[byeeeeeeeee]

It had been a couple of weeks since Eda had her run-in with the Visionary. Finding her in the kitchen, shaken and unfocused, had been upsetting in a way he struggled to define. He didn't think it was the alcohol. While he'd never tried it himself - Belos would have killed him, probably literally - he knew it was something adults indulged in.

No. The problem, he realized, was that he didn't recognize this version of Eda, and that...well, that scared him. He felt confused, uncomfortable, lost, and more than anything, useless. Eda and Raine had been helpful and kind to him, but he had no idea how to return the favor.

He didn't mean to distance himself, but he didn't want to burden either of them. He just needed to get a grip and figure out how to be a better...something... He'd been thinking of them as caregivers more lately - probably too presumptuous, but he secretly liked the thought of it. That didn't make him a son (of course not), but he figured, for research purposes, that that was a good place to start. Unfortunately, the library had all manner of books to help parents, but nothing to teach one how to be a good child. (He did find one titled "The Good Son". It was...not helpful.)

That is how he wound up on the couch in the common room after another disappointing trip to the library, laying on his back, both legs draped over the armrest, and staring up at the ceiling. Flapjack is practically on his forehead, trying to make a nest out of his hair. "Maybe we should check the enter-net?"

[edalyn]

Eda hasn't been doing the best, lately. The Visionary was just the start of the path things have been going down. Then there was Wolf Trap, and everything that happened in the Matrix. Not to mention... what she was starting to help Raine with. Which she wasn't about to mention to Hunter.

But none of that meant she'd missed the fact that Hunter was less present lately, or changed the way she felt bad about she fact she'd been less present lately. She wanted to give him space if she needed it, but she also wanted to make sure she was, well, around.

Whatever else was happening, being there for the kids was important. Well. Kid singular, here. Which was, in some ways, good. She wouldn't wish being stuck here on any others.

Which is why, when she sees Hunter, she takes the opportunity to casually sit on the free arm of the couch.

"How's it going, kiddo?" She'd heard something on her way into the room about checking the internet, but she decides not to pry.

[byeeeeeeeee]

Hunter is immediately aware when Eda enters the room, and watches her from the corner of his eye until he can't see her without bending his head. But he can hear her, and feel the couch shift some as she settles on the other arm.

He turns his stare back to the ceiling. "It's going." He quickly amends, "Good! It's going good."

Craning his head back to see her (and dislodging Flap in the process), he asks, "How are you?" He doesn't blame her for not being present. He doesn't expect her to be. It's not her job, after all. He isn't aware of what she and Raine are up to, so he figures she may still be upset about what the Visionary showed her. "Do you need anything?"

[edalyn]

Eda raises an eyebrow but seems a little amused at it's going. She's about to agree that that's certainly a mood around here, before he backtracks. She decides not to argue the point, even if it's not convincing.

"Oh, I'm alright," she says, because apparently two can play at not terribly convincing answers. She reaches to give Flapjack a little pat, somewhat absently.

"Nah," she adds, because while there are probably a lot of things she needs, even the ones that are possible aren't his job.

"What about you?" That's a more important concern anyway, or at least one she might be able to do something about.