Event - Untimely

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Untimely

➥ Reality Check

(cw: hypersomnia, coma, supernaturally induced metaphysical hunger, psychosomatic pain)

"We all dream," the representative from Copernicus explains, directing attention to a powerpoint slide projected onto the wall beside her. The seminar in one of the conference rooms is ADI's latest effort to combat Ava's influence and take the fight to their foe. If she's going to put them all to sleep, then so be it. Let their ranks be ready for battle there. "My boss, Zyrian Steel, is a big dreamer. Copernicus started as one. We-" She pauses as her eyes seem to catch on someone at the back of the room. "But that-that's another presentation! Suffice to say, Mr. Steel heard you were having some sleep troubles around the office and wanted to help.

"Hello, everyone. My name is Luna, and I'm here from Copernicus' Augmenting Reality group to talk to you about lucid dreaming. Now, I see some of us are here in our Halloween outfits." She smiles and poses in her 50's-style poodle skirt. "Some of you have very impressive make-up and prosthetics, I might add. I was told there might be some stiff competition for this mid-Halloween get-together. Glad to see they weren't having a little fun with me." Any non-human in the audience is given an appreciative nod. "I can see we have a few dreams brought to life here, but what about shaping the dreams we have while we're in them?"

"We're going to go through a few exercises today. The key tricks for inducing lucid dreaming include:

"One, assess your reality regularly. Even if you can't remember falling asleep, take a moment every few hours to test your reality. Dreams might look very familiar, but there will always be inconsistencies and distortions you can catch. This should help you to recognize when you're dreaming.

"Second, the MILD method or Mnemonic Induction of Lucid Dreams. This is a method where you'll set an alarm for 5 hours after you go to sleep. Once awake, you'll tell yourself, 'The next time I'm dreaming, I will remember that I'm dreaming.' You'll also try to imagine yourself in a lucid dream as you go back to sleep. Silly as it sounds, just having that intentionality can be highly effective.

"Third, tell yourself when you go to sleep that you are going to have a lucid dream, that you will be shaping your reality, even if it seems outside of your control. Convince yourself. Convince others.

"And fourth…" Luna pulls out some high-tech looking eyemasks. "You can try one of our patented Lucidio Eye Masks. These devices help to unlock your mind and provide it with a few extra cues that you're dreaming once you enter REM sleep. We'll be handing out a limited number of samples, courtesy Mr. Steel. That's for the end of our presentation. Now, let's go through the stages of sleep…"

Whether you can stay away for the rest of the presentation, everyone will be chivved awake with increasingly harsh prods if they've fallen asleep during the presentation. There are more seminars throughout the next few days, always similar with Luna offering her guidance on lucid dreaming. Maybe it's enough. Maybe it isn't.

The music doesn't stop. As with last October, the haunting tunes extend their grasp from the graveyards and out toward the rest of Gloucester, ringing through ADI's halls, along with the Flophouse. The music induces intense sleepiness, and you might find your coworkers slumping down while they walk or you might fall victim to the music, yourself.

You awake… somewhere. It might be a place that's familiar, or one that's utterly alien. What you know is that there is something in this place that calls to you, sings in your blood and burns to be away from. And yet, you're terrified. There is something here that wants to consume every part of you, suck the marrow from your bones and leave you a husk of what you once were. You need it. You want it. You are hungry for it. For the fear it both brings and demands. This place seems to be some sort of pocket dimension, a personal hell built just for you and the things that sink their teeth into your bones and claw at the back of your mind. This is a terrifying place.

And you're not alone.

If you've been paying attention to the seminars, perhaps you'll be able to recognize this as a dream, something that isn't real. Sensations that aren't real. A world that isn't real. But with that realization comes a choice. You could try to break free of your personal hell, rip it to shreds, make it less horrific. Or… or there is something that calls to you in this place, a thing that sounds the death of who you once were, perhaps. You could call back, reshape this reality to terrorize the others trapped here with you. They'll never know if you were aware or not, will they? They don't need to know you did this to them consciously.

Just this once, what if you gave in? If someone dies in the dream, it's not like they die in real life. Right?

➥ Knead Help

(cw: blood, unsanitary food, supernaturally-induced existential dread, supernaturally-induced suicidal thoughts, isolation, dissociation)

Deathbed Bread is off the market. Thanks to a timely tip, the Health Department has finally made a slightly less timely visit to Better Loaf than Never, and were forced to shut the storefront down when their inspectors were unable to gain entry to the kitchen. The lights are still on behind the boarded-up windows, though, the smell of sourdough still permeating the air as loaf after loaf is delivered through a slot from the kitchen through the day and night, bread piling up on the counter and floor behind the register. They come at regular intervals, still warm from the oven. ADI has taken over the little storefront now and set up a tiny field office there, the higher-ups having pulled enough strings for law enforcement to look the other way and not ask too many questions about the people coming and going as efforts to break into the kitchen intensify...and as ADI staff truck away loads of Deathbed Bread to incinerate back at headquarters.

Someone has a bright (or maybe desperate) idea: if they can't get in, maybe they can at least stop the bread from coming out. Boarding up the bread slot, by all accounts, works for perhaps an hour or two as those present can still hear more bread piling up on the other side. Then there's a soul-wrenching cry of anguish followed by a violent attack on the barrier from inside the kitchen that ends with an ADI agent injured by flying debris and a cascade of sourdough loaves stained with bloody handprints. It's enough, though. Whatever supernatural seal that made the kitchen blockade impenetrable has broken, and within the day ADI is able to break down the door.

A thick, unnatural fog is all that can be seen inside the doorway. Rather than the cool of an early morning, though, the damp air is hot and cloying; those who venture inside will soon find themselves drenched with a mix of sweat and humidity from the air. They will also soon find themselves alone, regardless of what companions they might have had with them when they entered. Did you have someone with you? You must have; it would be foolish to enter alone, and yet it rapidly becomes difficult to remember their face, their voice, the touch of their hand. Perhaps you imagined them. Perhaps you've always been alone.

Dark shapes in the fog resolve into tombstones as one nears--no, into huge, upright loaves of bread jutting up from where they've been sunk into the soft ground of this strange graveyard, dry and cracked and dead. There are names pressed into them, dates of death spanning the last few weeks…and the next few. Perhaps you'll spot your own name and today's date. And why shouldn't it be today? Everyone dies, and everyone dies alone. Any action other than laying down on the soft dough of your own grave and letting it swallow you up is only delaying the inevitable.

The spell of deathly quiet over this place isn't complete, though. Keep moving, keep trying, keep hanging on to thoughts of those you love and the clear sky beyond this little world, and you might find a friend who needs your help as much as you need theirs. One or both people encountering each other may feel as though they're in a dream, unable to see or hear the other–but with persistence, with feeling, it's possible to reforge the connection. Love and friendship may shine a light on what was invisible–but so will shared anger, joy, or disgust. Any strong, shared emotion beyond the fear and sadness that permeates this place renders would-be ghosts visible, solid, and real to one another, able to move forward or turn back to escape together–or to begin tearing up the tombstones in fierce denial of their portents.

This hellish graveyard is as far as most will go. Somewhere deeper in what was the kitchen, Bryn still labors and the bread still piles up. It will be up to those few lucky (or unfortunate) enough to stumble across him to put a final end to this.

➥ Never Sleep Again

(cw: child death, body horror, violence, potential injury or character death, nightmare dream logic)

Are you dreaming or are you awake? It becomes harder to tell as the music flows through halls and streets, rooms and parks. It’s dangerous out there, people falling asleep where they shouldn’t, or finding themselves face-to-face with what shouldn’t be when their eyes close unknowingly. Perhaps you planned it, your practice made perfect and your mind set to confrontation, maybe this time you sat down with the intention of stopping this. Or maybe it was simply an accident, but you’re here now. What else can you do but fight to survive?

The hellscape of your mind's torment might be familiar or maybe it’s a new flavor, but there’s something different this time. This time, there are seams; the dream around you is sewn together and you hold the scissors. Fight your way or will your way through, and you can pass between the swatches of your dreaming landscape. Maybe you find a friend or maybe you spot the retreating form of a little girl, turning a corner that isn’t there. Except you can see it now, the corridors of this place. You can follow her.

She leads you on a chase, her laugh a ricocheting titter of joy for the game. If you listen closely, however, there’s more to hear. The further you chase her, the more snatches of sound and sensation follow you as well. Grim melodies and snatches of song, searing heat, the taste of ash in your mouth, the sound of screaming that isn’t quite familiar. Your parents? Someone’s parents. Whispered voices. Snatches of words. ‘Amber.’ yelled, called, pleaded. Hide and seek was always fun.‘Ren’ a name that holds fondness, a feeling of a hundred tiny legs across skin- Stop! A command like a pick through your mind filled with anger and fear. Maybe it isn’t just your nightmares in here…

If you catch her, when you catch her, the game is over. Cornered and angry, Ava skitters up the wall, and across the ceiling to hang above you, neck at an impossible angle and clearly broken for it. “What’s wrong? Not having fun?”.

➥ Mod Notes

• GENERAL - Bryn and Ava will both be available for NPC interaction and threading. Players who want to talk to ask Luna anything should respond to the Questions section of the OOC post. The mods will provide her answers to specific questions. Characters who die in the dreams will not die in real life, but they will experience severe fatigue and pain, and may retain scarring in the waking world from whatever killed them in the nightmares. Characters who die in real life… well, they're dead. Please bear this in mind as the game does not have an easy resurrection mechanic.
  
  
• REALITY CHECK (16-25 October) - Everyone will be encouraged (but not technically required) to attend the lucid dreaming seminar. There will be a few of them over the course of three days. Characters can also pick up one of the Ludicio Eye Mask devices that will assist them in being able to enter a lucid state while dreaming. They don't always help, of course; they're mainly augmenting someone's abilities, provided they're following the guidance provided about how to enhance your lucid dreaming capabilities. Luna is clearly unaware that any non-humans are actually non-humans. She believes everyone is just really into Halloween around here.
  
  The nightmares this go around seem to be specifically focused on the Entities that your characters fear most and/or the ones they might be drawn to. You are welcome to make up a personalized hellscape for your character with anything you'd like in it. These are dreams! Go wild! Characters will fall randomly in and out of each other's dreams and personalized hellscapes. Those who have mastered lucid dreaming will be able to traverse dreams with more purpose, aiming to go to specific people's dreams or get themselves out of ones they don't want to be in. Lucid dream experts will also be able to shape the dreams that are meant for them. In their own nightmares, characters will feel a definitive pull toward one (or more over different nights) Entity and experience an intense fear of that Entity along with the desire to feed it, even if you want away from it.
  
  Feeding the Entities in the dreams and using the dreams to torment others will not necessarily lead to an Entity alignment… but it can do. Or it can set a character down a particularly destructive path in that vein. We would just ask that players remember that ADI is very anti-magic/Entities and anyone who is caught displaying powers/Entity alignment is liable to be mistrusted, watched, and potentially killed by the NPCs if they make themselves too much of an overt problem.
  
  
• KNEAD HELP (18-25 October) - Characters may find bread gravestones with their own names, the names of people they have lost, and people they fear losing, as well as names of locals who have been confirmed dead due to eating Deathbed Bread. Some gravestones will bear the names and correct dates for people who are actually dead; others will refer to people who are still alive. Gravestone engravings may include characters back home in player characters' worlds, as well as player characters that have been dropped from the game. OOCly, the appearance of a person's bread gravestone is not a reliable indication of whether that person is actually dead or going to die. ICly, characters may or may not realize this fact at players' discretion.
  
  
• NEVER SLEEP AGAIN (20-25 October) - As characters begin to gain control over their dreaming, they will find they can begin to track down Ava the Lullaby Girl. Confrontation can occur within the dream or, with enough willpower, a character can pull a piece of Ava into the waking world to try and kill her. Upon bringing her to the waking world, characters will find themselves faced with a teenaged version of the girl they were following, Ava’s actual body. She's not a little girl at all, but someone who's just entering into adulthood. Fights are likely to result in injuries ranging from mild to severe and can include death, please keep the setting’s death rules in mind for this. Threads with Ava can start in the dreams or already mid-fight in the waking world! It will take a concerted group effort to actually kill Ava. No one person will be able to do it themselves. Only a piece of her is pulled through or fought in the dreams that any person encounters.
  
  The morning after the last pieces are killed, Ava’s mangled corpse will be found on ADI’s grounds shortly after dawn, clutching a bloody, stuffed lamb in one hand.

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Comments

[edalyn]

To protect everyone... well, that motivation was like them. And sometimes like her. But the fact she understood it didn't make her feel better about Raine going down this path so much as it just made her feel worse about herself.

"It's not... the only thing you're good at." She could tell arguing wasn't exactly doing any good, but she still found herself trying not to sound as defeated as she was starting to feel. She grit her teeth and tried not to whimper as she struggled against the webs.

It was hard to look Raine in the (many) eyes, but she did her best--until she suddenly couldn't do it at all.

What happened to honesty huh? Wasn’t that kind of your thing or do I really not know you anymore?

She hadn't stopped to regret that when she'd said it. But she was regretting it now. Even if they'd said much the same when they were young, it still hurt.

In some ways, it hurt more than the fangs piercing into her flesh.

But that sharp sting was enough to wake her up all the same. She sat upright in her nest with a gasp and looked around frantically for a moment before things settled into place. She took a deep breath and swiped the back of her hand across her eyes, trying to ignore her feathers coming away damp.

It was a little while before she forced herself to get up. After all, she didn't have proof it wasn't just her own nightmare. And even if it wasn't, they could just not talk about it. That always ended well.

He hesitated outside Raine's door before knocking. There was no answer, but her feathery ears twitched as she caught a sound from inside. She opened the door to find the other witch in what appeared to be extremely restless sleep, looking about as miserable as she felt.

She moved to sit on the edge of their bed, putting a hand on their shoulder and squeezing lightly--although being careful with the claws. "Raine...? Rainstorm? Come on, wake up. It's just a nightmare." She hopes.

[rainewhispers]

Raine's forehead was beaded in sweat, their head tossing and turning too and fro on their pillow as they struggled to keep their wits about them in their dreaming state. Hands bunched up in the sheets covering them. They were mouthing something wordlessly in desperation, only making pitifully soft, sad sounds.

As Eda walked in and put a hand on their shoulder Raine's eyes snapped open and they launched upright in the bed. Their hand grasping her wrist as they stared her down. For a brief terrifying moment their eyes were glowing. Bright and feral as their whistling wheezes seemed to hiss and shriek around the room like the soft cries of a banshee. Things in the room seemed to rattle and lift slightly with the panic noises they were making.

Then, they blinked. Once .. twice.. And things began to settle. Raine let go of Eda's hand and stared her down as the maroon-red bardic glow began to die down into their normal green hue.

"Eda-" They started but it choked up fast and they lurched forwards, arms wrapping around her and burying their face in her shoulder, but there were no fangs this time. "It was horrible- a nightmare, a terrible nightmare and I couldn't stop it.."

[edalyn]

Normally the idea of being afraid of Raine--of them, like they might actually hurt her--not just afraid they were lying to her or doing something stupid... normally that would be ridiculous.

When they'd fought in the alley, back at the parade, even when they had hurt her she'd been more worried for them than anything else. Normally the glowing eyes and a little stray bard magic would be nothing. But there was enough of the nightmare lingering in her mind that she couldn't stop herself from flinching when they grabbed her wrist.

There was a little pause as they hugged her, too, breath catching in her throat at the feeling of being constricted again, when she could still practically taste the cobwebs filling her mouth as she tried to scream--

But it was Raine and they were upset and they needed her. She wrapped her arms around them and squeezed, hard, in a way that always used to ground them when they were kids. Only now she could fold her wings around them, too, for good measure.

"I know. I know. I was there. It's--it's okay now. It's just a nightmare. It's just this place." She did her best not to sound like she was trying to reassure both of them.

[rainewhispers]

Feeling her hold them tight, that pressure around them and the curl of her wings adding protection against everything outside of them, everything they couldn't control. It wasn't exactly one to one, the wings were new, the feathers were new, she was taller and stronger and they weren't just kids anymore! But... but it was familiar enough that steadily Raine's choked breathing started to find some kind of rhythm.

"I couldn't stop it I- I wanted to.. but-" They went ragged for a moment though, Eda could feel them tense but they didn't move away from her, only lifting their face up enough to talk clearly just off her shoulder.

"What.. what do you mean you were there..?"

[edalyn]

It was familiar enough that it didn't take Eda too long to relax, either. She didn't stop hugging them, but they could probably feel the muscles in her back slowly loosen up. She doubted she'd be forgetting that dream any time soon, but... it wasn't real. The version of her friend she was holding was.

She started to murmur another soft I know, probably once again for both of their benefit, but then she blinked.

"I... I guess I thought you realised. Sorry." Because she could have just, you know, not told them that was actually her. But maybe talking was for the best. She squeezed them a little tighter again. "It's okay."

[rainewhispers]

Raine didn't pull away, part of them wanted to but they were afraid that.. if Eda let them, they'd run away again. They'd run and try to protect her and get everyone hurt more and more in the process of trying to be some hero only that this time?

They'd be protecting Eda from themselves. They weren't sure if it made it better or worse but their breathing went ragged again as they gripped her like a lifeline.

"I'm sorry- I'm sorry Eda. I didn't want to hurt you again, not like this- not in any way but like this the least!"

They choked up and tears began to pool at their eyes and trail down their cheeks.

"I should have listened to you, I could hear you but it..."

It felt good to be in control.

"I couldn't stop myself."

[edalyn]

Eda let out a little sigh as she felt tears start to drip into her feathers. She just kept holding them, both to try and lend comfort and because this might be easier if they weren't quite looking at each other's faces right now.

She wasn't alright, but... she wasn't about to take that out on Raine. Hearing them apologize just made things worse. Just made her think of herself--and of someone else, suddenly. The first time her sister hurt someone while she was the raven beast.
Mom, I heard you but I couldn't stop myself. I... I couldn't do anything.

Everyone was good at blaming themselves, weren't they?

"Raine... Raincloud. Don't. I've spent enough time beating myself up over things the owl beast did to watch you do it, too. And it doesn't even feed off fear like these things."

[rainewhispers]

Raine didn't say anything for a moment. Softly crying against her as they thought to the horrible voices of Terra and Belos and-... And Eda. Not the one who cried out for them to stop listening to them.

The version of Eda they thought they knew years and years ago.

Slowly the tension started to pool out of them into an exhausted weight against her.

"How do you do it..?" They asked, quietly and sombrely, "How do you cope with.. that. The things you can't control?"

[edalyn]

Eda, meanwhile, was trying very hard not to think about that part of the dream. That part nagged in a way that was harder to explain away. But it wasn't time to deal with that yet.

Instead, as Raine relaxed against her, she stopped squeezing them quite so hard and instead moved a hand to start stroking their hair, being careful not to scratch them.

She opened her mouth to give a serious answer, and then paused. This might be a good time to break the tension. "Well, it used to take a lot of apple blood. But... you could try feeding the Web some mice?"

[rainewhispers]

They leaned their head against her hand somewhat, the feeling of long nails gently raking against their scalp was nice, they had to admit. Familiar too.. they missed this.

At her response they let out a soft, choked up laugh. Slowly and steadily they pulled back, staying close to her and keeping a hand on her shoulder to stay steady while the other wiped at their eyes.

"Is- Sorry.. is mice more or less effective than drinking?"

[edalyn]

Eda let them pull away, but kept her hand where it was for the moment, continuing to gently run her claws through their hair. They'd be able to see that she'd also teared up a little bit more than she'd be trying to let on, but at least she was laughing now. Awkward, but genuine and a little relieved to have made them laugh.

"...More actually." She moved to bury her face in their shoulder this time, but that was more to do with the fact she'd just admitted to eating mice than genuine distress. (A stray thought briefly wondered if she'd managed to make her chances of getting them to kiss her any time soon even worse.)

"Pretty sure that part won't be the same for you, though."

[rainewhispers]

They couldn't help but continue the soft laughter as she admitted the mice helped more. Which was honestly a bit surprising if her drinking habits are still anything like what they were back in the day. They couldn't help but even snort a bit at it, an unseeming sound they they tried to avoid at the best of times.

But this was Eda.

"Yeah.. I don't even know how I'd do that. I don't know if there's any spiders here big enough for a mouse." Their laughter trailed off gently as they let out a content sigh. "Do- do you actually feed the Owl Beast mice? How does that work?"

[edalyn]

Eda chuckled into their shoulder at that little snort, it always used to feel like scoring a point to be able to make them lose their composure in little ways.

All of this was starting to feel surprisingly familiar. Being up at an odd hour of the night with them, just… talking and snuggling and playing with their hair and making each other laugh. It was nice, if she ignored the context. She was starting to realise just how touch-starved she was these days.

After a moment she pulled away enough to answer, but stayed close. "Titan… where do I even start," she muttered half to herself.

"I've learned a lot about the curse. I used to think when I changed that maybe it was just–me but out of control or… something." Eda glanced away, trying not to dwell on how that had made her feel. Even if that was what she wanted to help Raine avoid.

"I mean I used to have nightmares about it but… I didn't know it was genuinely its own thing. A real animal that used to exist. Someone hunted it down and turned it into a curse scroll."

[rainewhispers]

Raine wasn't quite as technically touch-starved. They don't have many people they feel close enough with to allow that vulnerability, that much is true but.. There's also the feeling of contact they're no stranger to when it comes to people they'd rather avoid.

Firm hands on their shoulders, nails not quite digging in, a stern voice.
Come, sprout.

But Eda? Eda was so.. easy. It wasn't like everyone else, am I being too pushy? Am I being too distant? Too close? Too far? Eda was natural and intuitive, limbs intertwined and arms holding bodies close under the stars.

Was it wrong to want that again, after all they've done to her?

Best not to dwell on it.

Raine moved a hand to brush down the feathers on her Back, between the inside of her wing and her shoulder. "Really..? How did you even realize that's the case? Can you- I mean.. can you talk to it?"

[edalyn]

Eda started to say something else, then paused, leaning just a little into their hand and stretching her wing up and to the side a bit, feathers spreading out before settling back down. While Eda--fortunately--didn't have anyone especially overbearing in her life, she wasn't comfortable with this kind of closeness from most people. Raine didn't count as most people.

Right. Focus. Where was she?

"It's... a long story. Involving Hooty," she added, because honestly that should be enough to tell them they probably didn't want to sit through that entire story.

"But, well, I saw its memories in a dream. And they weren't very nice. I used to hate the thing," and by extension herself, but again best not dwell on that. "But... then I saw it needing help." She shrugged a shoulder almost sheepishly. But it wasn't like Raine didn't know she was a sap at heart. Still, it was hard to open up about all this even now, and she curled in on herself a bit, absently scratching her claws down one of her arms.

"Turns out it was just... lost, and angry, and scared. Neither of us wants to be here but we can't change it, either. So... yeah. I talk to it these days. Trying to learn to live with each other, you know?" She really hoped all this wasn't just making the curse sound more confusing than it already used to.

[rainewhispers]

Raine listened intently, hanging onto her words and the meaning behind them like they were fragile, delicate things. Eda wasn't those descriptors, really. Yet these feelings, her opening up? Maybe.. maybe they were wrong about her, about the way they've let their own feelings influence their perception of her. It was nice, seeing this side of her, the opening up to vulnerability and trust.

Their eyes drifted to the scratching claw and they gently moved to take that hand idly, worrying about her hurting herself some way or another. Instead they started to run their thumb over her palm, tracing little lines as she talked.

For a moment Raine didn't say anything, tried to swallow back the welling starting to tide over in their eyes again.

"You're the bravest person I know, Eda, I hope you realize that. I.. I have trouble facing my own problems when they aren't something tangible like the Owl Beast is, something that can't just.. take over like that but.."

Their voice wavered and they squeezed her hand a bit tighter, not enough to hurt, certainly not her. Just enough to remind themselves that they were real, and this wasn't a terrible dream again.

"The truth is for some time I've been struggling. With the path I took in life, the things I've done to others.. to you, especially. The way I- I let myself think of you in a way I know is wrong but it's been so long and- and-" They felt their throat closing up and they took a moment to deeply breath, let it out in a heavy sigh as they looked to her face again.

"I want to know you. All of you. In the here and now and not just.. when we were young and honestly kind of stupid- more so than we still are about this anyways." They added with a soft, sad sort of chuckle.

[edalyn]

Eda didn't object to them taking her hand. Normally the reassurance might have been awkward but right now it helped a bit.

And then she squeezed back as their voice cracked, a little surprised when they opened up as much as they did. She wasn't convinced she was brave, but she decided it wasn't the time to argue that point. As for the rest, well, it was a lot. There was a time when she wanted an apology, but right now... right now she just didn't like hearing Raine blame themself like that.

She swallowed, doing her damnedest not to tear up again, and bit back some old instinct to get overwhelmed and run. (What was that about brave? Hah.)

But instead she just… looked at them for a moment. Really took in what was familiar and what wasn't. The decades she hadn't spent with them. That they hadn’t spent with each other.

Little things. The bags under their eyes that didn't used to be that deep, and the new creases at the corners. The faint but notable lines etched into their forehead from a lifetime of stage fright. Their hairline creeping back at the temples, and the narrow waves of silver across the seafoam green. The way they'd filled out, just a bit, overall. Stronger both in build and something in the set of their jaw, even now. A kind of strength that showed in telling her all this, or at least that was how it read to her.

Even if Raine didn’t look quite as old as she did these days, they'd both missed a lot, hadn't they? They'd both changed a lot.

But their eyes were the same, their bone structure, the planes of their face–albeit sharper and squarer than ever (those potions really did work wonders).

The calluses on their fingertips were achingly familiar as she idly traced her thumb over them.

They were still gorgeous. They were still Raine.

And she still loved them, didn't she?

Then she realised she was looking at them just a little too long and dropped her gaze with a small, very awkward chuckle.

"Raine, you... you did the right thing for you, back then. And that's okay. You had so much going for you and I--I should have let you help me," she admitted, even though there was a little bit more to that than she was quite ready to articulate. "But that wasn't your job. You didn't need all that." By which she meant her, probably.

"Look how much you've done with your life. No regrets on my account, alright? I'm proud of you." Even if it didn't work out, even if it didn't save everyone in the end... they got as far as they did. While she just wasted most of the last two decades.

"But... I really wasn't trying to use you. Ever. Just so you know." They already said they knew the way they were thinking of her was wrong, but she still felt the need to say it. She didn't sound like she was defending herself, just... sad if she ever made them feel that way.

[rainewhispers]

As Eda took in Raine, Raine had already absorbed so much about Eda. They remember the little ways the curse had shown even when they were younger, the greying forming at her temples. Little wrinkles and creases around her eyes and the corners of her mouth when she smiled so wide when she was far too young to show that age so early.

The grey had overtaken that fire-y orange now, and the aging hadn't stopped. It wasn't a bad thing, necessarily. Raine thought it wizened her and make her unstoppable energy and boasting confidence all the more impressive. Yet.. there was also a fear there for Raine.

The curse was taking its toll and some part of them worried if it kept this pace they may not have as much time together as Raine wanted them to. It made them appreciate the time they did have, and that they had been taking it for granted far.. far too much.

They wanted to know every part of this Eda. All the things she must have learned now, the things she must have seen and experienced without the oppressive hold of the covens that she always seemed to rise above somehow. She was strong and wonderful and..

And she was beautiful, really. Feathers and all, not that that was even a detractor really. She looked fierce with them in a way that tugged at Raine's chest in a contradictory way to how they even saw her like this initially.

They wanted to bring their hands to her face, cup the sharp angles and downy feathers that framed it. There was no reasonable way to describe how much they wanted to kiss her in this moment.

No reasonable way of course, because they didn't deserve that from her, not now, if ever.

They were going in circles, apologizing one after the other and some part of them knew they should just stop but there was that guilt that bubbled up as she mentioned that part of their dream and they found themselves doing it again. Maybe it was just compulsory, or maybe they were trying to give themselves more reason to drown those indulgent sappy thoughts.

"Eda- Eda it wasn't my job no.. but that doesn't mean you didn't deserve someone there to help you. That you didn't deserve me there to help you. That's what you do for the people you-" love that was the word on the tip of their tongue before they swallowed it down like a stone in a river. "The people you care about.."

They let out a soft sigh and leaned forwards a bit, gently resting their forhead against hers with their eyes shut, still holding her hand. "I'm going to do better by you, I promise."

[edalyn]

The way Raine trailed off there hurt, a little. Not even a feeling of being insulted or rejected as much as a dull little ache, a twinge in her chest at the fact that the two of them weren't as open as they used to be. She wanted that back, but she wasn't sure it was realistic.

She used to tell them she loved them all the time when they were kids. They were her only close friend and honestly she didn't have enough of a filter not to.

Night. Luv ya, Rainstorm. Titan, you're the worst… that's why I love you. I love you, I love you Iloveyou–
Easy as anything. Easy as breathing.

It got… weird, heavier once they were actually dating. Something she said less often because it felt like it was supposed to mean more.

I… I love you. I mean it.
And then, eventually, something she mostly said when she felt the distance growing between them and didn't know how to fix it.

You know I love you, right?
And finally, when that started to sound desperate, at least to her ears, a thing she stopped saying at all.

...
She wanted to say it now, but she wasn't sure this was the time. At least they were here. The two of them were talking again, and they were holding her hand, and they were here. One step at a time.

She closed her eyes and just leaned in herself. She didn't say anything, for a moment, after they made that promise. Instead she paused in tracing the shape of their hand with the pad of her thumb and just squeezed. Maybe a little too tightly.

"Raincloud…" When she did speak, there was a teasing little whine in her voice that almost hid the fact they'd almost set her sniffling again.

"If we keep fighting over who gets the last apology in, we're going to be here all night."

A beat passed. "Actually… do you want me to be here all night?"

Eda pulled away a little, giving them a smile that managed to be sheepish even with all the teeth, and quickly clarified what she meant. "I can stay. If you want. You know, in case of… more nightmares."

[rainewhispers]

Raine chuckled softly at the mention that they'd be there all night. It trailed off into a soft exhale at the offer.

Their eyes stayed down on her hand, resisting the urge to hold their hands up, palm to palm. Comparing the ways they've changed, her talons and feathers and... they wanted nothing more than to trace every line and difference she's gained in the years.

But.. they would need time, and this? This was just one night, and they didn't want to let her go.

"I would like that, having you here.. if you'd have me." They spoke hushed and uncertain but with a warm fondness that laced its way through their voice.

Raine then slipped from her grasp to scoot over on their bed to the side a bit more and pat the spot they'd made beside them.

"We're prepared now if it happens again after all. Better to be in it together."

[edalyn]

Eda couldn’t help quirking an eyebrow, just a little, at if you'd have me. After all, that certainly sounded some kind of a way. But… what if they were just being self-deprecating again, being unsure if she wanted to stay after, well, earlier?

It sounded romantic, but she wasn’t completely sure, and then they pulled away and agreed with her reasoning and well, she just wasn’t sure. Which is why while she sounded a little awkward, she didn’t actually intend it as shutting them down when she decided to respond with, "yeah, course… what are friends for, right?"

She just didn’t want to get her hopes up and say something stupid if they didn't mean it that way. Moreover, she didn't want to put them on the spot, or pressure them.

Normally, she might have leaned into the kind of teasing and flirting that she could play off as a joke. But right now, even that would have felt… she didn't want to come off like she had ulterior motives. Not after they opened up about their guilt around leaving her, not while they were being vulnerable. Not right when she was worried they thought they owed her anything.

Whatever else she might have been starting to let herself hope for down the road, she wanted to be very clear that this, tonight, the offer to stay with them was as a friend.

Which wasn't even to say that that felt like less, in her mind. Whether they were anything else or not, Raine Whispers had always been, first and foremost, her best friend. She's missed that as much, if not more than the rest.

…She just wouldn't complain if she was allowed to kiss them, too.

Tonight, though, none of that. Instead she just stretched out on her side of the bed, and reached to grab their wrist lightly and coax them to lay down with her. If they let her, she’d wrap an arm around them and pull them close again. She’s missed just… holding them.

[rainewhispers]

There was love in those words. A confession sinking its venomous teeth into their speech and infecting it with need and desire. They wanted to say so much more, wanted to pour their heart out to her, hold her here til death do them part and titan they were so- so stupid for letting go.

What are friends for, right?

It was like an arrow in their side, nearly piercing the heart. But they smile on softly as she got comfortable beside them. Taking hold of their wrist and they interlaced their fingers as they shifted it palm to palm while laying back. An arm around them squeezing them close as they felt the piercing pain near their heart spread. They didn't want it to stop, none of it. It made them realize how much they missed this.

They thought little of spiders and strings and the way they puppeteered her around so easily like a fly in a web. They didn't want to let her go again but.. it was her choice now, they had to recognize that.

Sleep came slowly and faster than they anticipated like this. Safe and secure and not a nightmare to be seen, then again even before their eyes grew too heavy to keep open it was hard to tell if this wasn't already a wonderful dream.