NETWORK post, backdated to the 15th

[failedpromise]

Who: Cortana
Username: Chosewell
Warnings: Cybersecurity bullshit, high likeliness for supernaturally fueled paranoia

Just a little PSA:

If you're getting weird, hurtful, or distressing messages from you friends, don't panic. No one's account has been hijacked, and no one is secretly plotting against you.

Someone is spoofing accounts, however. For those of you who didn't pay attention in cybersecurities class, that means someone can make it seem as though they're someone else. Anyone else.

Unfortunately, whoever it is is really good at hiding their identity, so I don't actually know who the real culprit is yet.

(Says the AI who impersonated Manji for laughs, to a bunch of people who are supernaturally predisposed to paranoia right now.

...This isn't gonna be disastrous at all.)

Comments

[thedoctorsmate]

Have you?
How does that feel?
Is it like, I dunno, getting into a car and just traveling somewhere for you?

[failedpromise]

More like becoming the car and traveling somewhere, though the vehicles here aren't actually advanced enough to host me. ADI doesn't approve, so I haven't done it much, but it does save time when hacking.

[thedoctorsmate]

Yeah, I can imagine if you're just inside the computer.
I got trapped in a computer once for a while.
It was nice.
I mean, up until it wasn't.
Saved me from getting eaten by horrible shadow aliens, though.

[failedpromise]

Nice, huh?

You sure you don't mean confining?

(She much prefers being outside the computer over being inside of it.)

Something tells me there's a story here.

[thedoctorsmate]

Definitely a story.
But it didn't feel confining for most of it.
Not until I noticed I was actually in a computer.
Didn't realize it at first.
In my universe, there's a place called The Library.
It's one massive planet that's a repository for every book that's ever been made.
At least up to a certain point.
There was a problem that happened.
They used the wrong trees to make the books and these shadow aliens called the vashta nerada got in, infested the whole place.
The Doctor called them piranhas of the air.
Don't suppose you've got anything like that where you're from?

[failedpromise]

Can't say I've ever heard anything about airborne piranhas.

So where exactly does being inside a computer come into all this?

[thedoctorsmate]

The Doctor's ship, the TARDIS, brought us to the Library.
I got separated from him and the rest of the group we found there.
To stop the vashta nerada from eating me, the consciousness running the library used a sort of teleportation beam.
It put my mind into the database, built a whole little life for me there with a husband and family.
There wasn't any harm meant by it.
The consciousness in the computer was a little girl who'd been really sick.
Her family had built her the library and uploaded her to the machine something like a hundred years ago.
To save everyone who'd been in the Library the day the vashta nerada hatched, she did the same for them.
Put us all in there and slowly started coming apart as she tried to keep everything going.
Preserving our consciousnesses until the Library was safe to return us.

[failedpromise]

(Well that's a story, alright.)

Wait, are you saying that she used a teleporter to digitize you?

(Setting the rest of that for the moment. That's ... well, impossible seems like a bit much considering everything she's encountered here, but the last time someone tried something like that in her world, it didn't turn out well.)

[thedoctorsmate]

Yeah.
Something like that, I guess?
I mean, I have a body now.
So she was able to, like... rebuild me back into a normal human after putting me into the computer.
The Doctor said I was normal, anyway, after he did a scan thingy with his screwdriver.

[failedpromise]

Okay, putting aside the fact that everything I know says that shouldn't be possible...

His screwdriver?

[thedoctorsmate]

It's sonic.

[That clearly explains everything.]

[failedpromise]

Sonic as in "related to the nature of sound or soundwaves"? Because that doesn't explain anything.

[thedoctorsmate]

Look, it's an alien thing.
He waves it around and it sort of... buzzes?
And then he reads things off of it.
About the only thing it can't do is wooden locks.
But he's got me if he needs to break down any doors.

[failedpromise]

So in other words, you have no idea how it actually works.

[thedoctorsmate]

Sorry 'how an alien screwdriver works' wasn't top of my list for traveling around the universe.

[failedpromise]

You weren't even a little curious?

(Come on, that's no fun! At least tell her you "borrowed" it at some point to play with.

...The Doctor should probably feel fortunate he has never had to deal with Cortana.)

[thedoctorsmate]

Alien screwdriver or meeting some of the greatest figures from history across the galaxy.
Which would you be more interested in?

[failedpromise]

How about both?

(Cortana wants it all.)

[thedoctorsmate]

[Donna sighs to herself.]

How about you ask him about the screwdriver if he shows up here before we find a way to get back home?

[failedpromise]

(Sorry you befriended such an obnoxious little shit of an AI, Donna.)

Hm, I think I will.

[thedoctorsmate]

[She's regretting her life choices.]

Right, well.
Good luck with that.
I'm sure he'll love you.

[failedpromise]

(She likes you now, so there's no escape.)

Was there ever any doubt?

[thedoctorsmate]

Oh, you.
My break's near up.
Talk to you later.
You nerd.

[failedpromise]

See you.