[ closed ]

[earthshine]

Who: shiro + keith
When: perm log for these idiots
Where: all over
Summary: say, say o playmate from the august tdm. the butcher's camp from the september tdm. quarter pounder from the september event. keith's birthday. hermy the wormy from the december tdm. in the hive from the december event.new year, new you from the january tdm. end of january, references january event.
Warnings:
say, o say o playmate: hallucination, blood, ritualistic sacrifice, claustrophobia.
the butcher's camp: animal death, animal mutilation, both human and animal butchery, implied cannibalism, stripping ( nsfw ).
quarter pounder: blood, animal attack, consumption of human flesh, violence, gore, body horror, potential for severe injury, including puncture wounds and broken bones, potential for choking, potential for animal death.
keith's birthday: boys being stupid.
hermy the wormy: worms, decay, altered mental states/compulsion, emotional corruption, potential for violence, body mutilation, attempted murder.
in the hive: insects/swarms, bites, vomiting, body horror, death ( npcs ), mental and physical trauma
new year, new you: self-doubt, body dysmorphia trauma, cringe talk about sex safety, hook-up culture, body modification ( steroid and synthol oil use ), mention of drug use
end of january: implied animal death, self-doubt, body image issues, body dysmorphia, self-harm, body mutilation, skin burning, drug use mention ( tren steroid ), implied extreme dieting ( starvation & dehydration ), nsfw ( heavy petting and nudity ). reference to shiro's scars.

Comments

[marmoron]

[ heart skipping beats as hands go on either side of him, keith closes his eyes as shiro kisses hi gently. it doesn't last long though, and with just that tease of pressure, shiro backs off and sits down beside him. it's hard to know what that twist in his stomach is about -- disappointment that shiro didn't cage and force his back to the mattress for a more crushing kiss or some fucked up sense of relief that shiro isn't pinning him down.

keith slams the brakes on that thought hard before it tailspins. to his side, shiro's got a grin on his face, and the little secrecy pact makes keith huff with amusement. ]

Uh-huh. Cuz you know I'm just dying to greet our new roommate with "Hi, I'm Keith and I had a bonding moment with your other roommate on your bed. Nice to meet you."

[ he shakes his head, giving shiro a playful elbow to the side. ]

Even I know that wouldn't go over well. [ another beat, then he straightens out his arm, hand resting on shiro's lats. ]

... Recreational activities sounds less awkward than bonding moment.

[earthshine]

[ listen, with the mind fuckery that’s been going on in this reality lately, shiro wouldn’t be surprised if a sudden desire to taunt their new roomie struck one or both of them. or maybe an inexplicable need to tell horrible truths. in either case, a sworn pact wouldn’t mean anything. still, he supposes it’s nice to know that keith has some semblance of social awareness not to scar their future prospects. this is, of course, coming from the man who stuck their first roommate inside a dryer for a ten second spin. so out of the two of them, who is more likely to fudge things up with their future roomie?

… why is he even thinking about this?

shiro catches himself in the midst of a tangent and inwardly winces. keith is making jokes about things sounding awkward… but what about things being awkward? sometimes they come together so easily, shiro doesn’t even have to think about it, and then, not even five seconds later, he’s fumbling over where to put his hands. perhaps that’s the trick: everything runs better when he doesn’t delve deep in his own head and try to anticipate the consequences of every move. the next time he wants to do something, he should simply do it, before he can talk himself down from it. ]

I like bonding moment. [ okay, on second thought, he can still spend time on thinking through his words. momentarily flustering over the dweebiness of such a statement, shiro briefly glances down and – ah. keith’s lap. his thighs. the framing of his hips. shiro leaned over him a few moments ago and dialed back to settle into something easier, something likely more acceptable: sitting beside keith. which then, of course, led them to this nonsensical conversation and keith saying words like awkward.

right. no thought. just do it.

so shiro does. in the next breath he’s moving and by the end of it, he’s got his knees to the bedding and a leg folded on either side of keith’s hips, straddling his lap. shiro, unfortunately, still doesn’t know what to do with his hands but after a beat of hesitation, rests them on keith’s shoulders. fuck, he’s a narrow thing, a fact made more apparent by the dwarfing of shiro’s overall mass. the two of them like this likely looks awkward, but shiro hopes it doesn't feel awkward. ]

This qualify as a good bonding moment?

[ ignore the warmth of his cheeks, please. ]

[marmoron]

[ the cringe isn't entirely lost on keith. bonding moment had sounded better in his head because that's what they're doing, more so than purely being recreational, but the distinction is maybe one that he's drawing purely in his head. besides, if shiro's categorizing this as a "recreational activity" shouldn't he just follow that lead? the thoughts all hit in retrospect though, and the squirmy feeling in keith's stomach intensifies for a beat while waiting on shiro's verdict.

i like bonding moment comes a few ticks later, and somehow, despite the inanity of it all, it actually makes keith smile in earnest. this feels so much more like shiro than the gut wrenching way shiro had been in the bathroom. of course, it isn't as simple as to say one facet of shiro's personality is the real shiro when shiro's comprised of every facet, both wonderful and hurtful, but there's a flutter in his chest distinct from anxiety.

but shiro isn't done there. his best friend starts shifting and: [

Oh.

[ ohh.... eyes round, keith isn't able to keep his surprise to himself when there's a sudden lapful of best friend and his field of vision gets overtaken by a wall of perfectly sculpted chest. the heat rises to his cheeks instantly, heart hammering in his throat as he looks from one pec to the other. his expressions sobers somewhat as he glances at the angry burn scored down over an existing scar, but he doesn't say a word about it and instead presses a soft smooch just to the right of it. the kiss holds for three long ticks, and then keith finally pulls his face away to wrap both arms around shiro's waist. ]

It could be a better bonding moment.

[ his voice comes out soft, just on the cusp of teasing as keith starts to pull shiro down for a kiss. then when their lips meet, he wraps his arms tighter around shiro as he lies back on the bed, encouraging him to follow. ]

[earthshine]

[ his body has been on full display for a good while now. the reminder is meant to be a comfort, but it only seems to intensify shiro’s self-awareness of every flaw and every ugly rip that has his skin looking like a patchwork. he knows keith doesn’t care. wait, he cares, of course, but he doesn’t hold the imperfections against him, even the ones shiro’s done to himself. again, he keeps trying to calm the uptick of his heartbeat by stacking reassurances, but it’s a difficult thing to sit there and make no indication of the anxiety churning his insides, when keith’s eyes are zeroed in on his chest.

keith leans in and shiro holds his breath. he only notices he’s doing it once keith’s lips find their mark and the breath comes stuttering out of him in a half-choke. all at once, that ugly churning feeling smooths over and shiro is confronted with an entirely different predicament of keeping himself together. it doesn’t matter that it’s not directly over the scar; it’s gross and open and so far from healed. he understands the offset. it doesn’t matter, the effect is the same: it has shiro swallowing thick and fighting off a tremble, feeling too much. it’s a near constant ache at this point, the burn, but shiro’s threshold for pain dulls it to triviality. here, the long held kiss redirects his awareness and he thinks stings, to how the skin agitates under the pressure of keith’s mouth. still, he doesn’t want it to go. keith pulls back and he misses the throbbing ache, both of his chest and of his heart hidden behind, everything that makes up his soul seizing for this moment.

he can’t even begin to verbalize why such a simple action shakes him to the core and it’s just as well, because keith doesn’t give him the chance to flounder. he’s coaxed in for a kiss and of course, of course shiro doesn’t resist at the barest hint of a pull. hook, line and sinker, shiro is caught and seduced on soft, bittersweet feeling, so where keith goes, he goes too.

– mostly. palms to the bedding give way to his forearms braced instead, keeping the majority of his weight comfortably lifted. as for his lower body? knees still to the mattress and thighs folded over his claves as before, he’s still straddling those hips… but his ass is higher. lifted. up. barely, but just enough that their laps don’t touch. it’s another one of those anticipatory actions meant to keep some semblance of measured control. stupid, unneeded, it’s both.

nonetheless, it still takes a moment, two, even three, before he lowers his pelvis. lips parted and seeking a deeper indulgent kiss, shiro sighs into keith’s mouth as he presses his crotch to keith’s. there are layers between them but shiro swears he can feel the heat of his skin. it only makes him want to feel more. temptation dogs him but he does nothing. no push, no rub, no grind, he merely rests against him, feeling his cock give the tiniest pulse of interest. as for the rest of shiro? he slides his left forearm a little higher, angling his fingers into keith’s hair and thumb to brush at the curve of his ear, mouth still eagerly moving against his. ]

[marmoron]

[ kissing shiro through the recline onto the mattress is breathtaking in just about every sense of the word. despite every bit of contact tethering keith to the moment, it still doesn't feel quite real. is that because the loneliness and confusion of the last few weeks is something he'd grown accustomed or because the idea of someone as incredible as shiro could ever want him like this seems out of this world? heh. how fucked up is that second thought anyway? here they are in some messed up reality where fears are literal cosmic beings and somehow that's normal, but the most amazing person keith knows liking him back isn't?

keith's breath hitches audibly as his back hits the mattress. his heart rate picks up another notch as the familiarity of being under shiro makes his adrenaline spike. but it's not fear this time. or maybe it is? heat blooms between his legs as anticipation rockets right into his cock. is that embarrassing? probably. but the kiss gets deeper, filthier and keith can't help moaning a little as shiro relaxes and presses their hips together. ]

Shit...

[ the word's mumbled into shiro's outh, somewhat dazed and definitely not as cue to stop. keith brings one arm up higher up on shiro's back, fingers idly mapping out scar tissue on the way up to his neck, while the other goes just low enough to hook fingers inside the waistband of shiro's boxer briefs. ]

[earthshine]

[ shit is right; what are they doing? the question comes and goes, and shiro doesn’t care to overanalyze the way he feels right now. the simplest way to put it is that he feels secure. he’s still quite a ways from feeling whole but that’s a detriment of his life he’s not sure he’ll ever straighten out. this however, this has his faith restoring – his faith in the strength of their friendship and the depth of keith’s devoted nature. to be accepted by keith, as well as cared for so readily has shiro so hopelessly eager to bestow keith with affection after affection, as he should have done months ago.

his mind is fogging. the play of keith’s fingers against his skin is welcome, even encouraged by one low, throaty sound. he doesn’t flinch as that touch slides over the raised tissue of one scar, two, three. after keith’s long-held kiss right there on his pec, shiro finds himself wanting, just a little, for keith to find his other scars. it’s such an odd feeling to have; it’s a complete one-eighty. he’s still very much of the opinion that he’s ruined and less of who he used to be, with literal pieces of himself dug out or cut away from him… but there’s purpose in the way keith touches him and a mindfulness that’s disarming. keith makes him feel – okay.

it’s good to feel wanted; really good.

so those fingers slipping inside his waistband get an angling of shiro’s hip and a pressing into that touch. the message is clear: this is welcome, this is good, more…? okay, the last one is murkier. he doesn’t know if he wants more to lead to more discarded clothing. not that a thin pair of undies will do much to conserve his modesty at this rate. he can still feel that heat, where they’re intimately pressed together and with each breath, shiro becomes further lost on a desire to ask for a little more. he shifts again, but this time it’s a brush. no, not a brush. a grind. one, tiny, very brief rub of his clothed cock against keith’s and then he pauses, sucking in a sharp breath as he breaks the kiss. ]

Yeah? [ okay? more? of this? of something else? shiro’s the only one here with experience but he can’t say he knows what he’s doing either. ]

[marmoron]

[ if his dick weren't fully hard before, the singular grind that rolls the warm, solid pressure of shiro's body over his clothed arousal is all it takes to make his cock ache and strain against the confines of his red boxers. keith forgets to kiss through it, and moans into shiro's mouth instead. he clearly isn't expecting his best friend to break the kiss early, so his lips stay red and parted for a few beats while most of the blood in his body goes straight to feeding his other head.

yeah? the question makes him blink. ]

Yeah...

[ it's parroted instinctively, questioning tone removed. the possibility that shiro isn't just asking if he's okay, but if the grinding in particular is okay is a secondary thought. a light pink dusts his cheeks as keith aimlessly tugs at shiro's boxer briefs. ]

.. but with dicks out? [ the color deepens as he speaks, threatening to spread to his ears. ] ... Kinda uncomfortable with underwear on.

[ translation: no, he doesn't want to cum in his pants. ]

[earthshine]

[ kinda uncomfortable he says. there it is, the last barrier between them, and keith is giving the green light. of course with a handful of kisses given and some bold touching already stolen, the possibility of going back has dwindled to near nothing. if they lose the boxers though, there truly is no going back. confronted with that thought, shiro clearly pauses on decision, blinking down at keith’s flushed face for two, one… ]

Right. [ he feels warm all over, but a little more harshly across his collarbones and the back of his neck. his throat has gone dry on the realization that he’s seconds shy of seeing keith’s dick and feeling it pressed against his. ] You’re right.

[ so, balancing on one arm, he reaches between their bodies and bypassing keith’s own incessant hand, shiro pinches the fabric there at the front. a pull down and he gets the waistband scrunched below his balls. it’s unnerving as anything new is, but shiro does his best not to let any of it show in his face as his dick, part-chubbed and steadily hardening, hangs between them. at least he isn’t dripping; yet.

swallowing to put moisture back in his throat that still feels far too dry, shiro then drops his hand to keith’s hip, not quite hooking fingers on his waistband. ]

Should I…?