Steve Rogers ☆ Captain America (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
punched_hitler) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
apocalypsehowcomm2022-05-08 06:04 pm
punched_hitler) wrote in apocalypsehowcomm2022-05-08 06:04 pm
Log: Early days of May
Who: Steve Rogers and OTA
When: First half of May
Where: Prompts include Dogtown (Rivertouched), a random bar/the streets of Gloucester, and the train,. You can also catch him at ADI or in his apartment/around the ADI housing building, or hit me up if you have other ideas!
Summary: Steve has been here for a month and still feels like he's a little adrift. He doesn't like it. He takes the mission in Dogtown, then "investigates" some local haunts (i.e., bars) to try to relax, and boards the train with the rest of his colleagues for whatever lies ahead.
Warnings: supernatural compulsion, hallucination, suicidal ideation and drowning (past and potentially present) drinking/drunkenness, nyctophobia, burns/dead bodies
It's better than the Arctic
His conversation with Yelena shortly after arriving had piqued Steve's interest in Dogtown, so when the opportunity arises to check it out for himself, he takes it. Sure, he's got the ADI-issued GPS in his pocket, but he sure as hell doesn't plan on using it. (Maybe he'll change his mind. We'll see.)
All he's got to record with is his phone and he knows how to use it, but frankly he's more interested in simply finding out what's up with this place than actually documenting anything or earning any reward. He won't outright abandon his partner, of course, but they must have taken different paths back at the fork, because now he's standing at the edge of a river that he doesn't… think was on the map he'd looked up, but hadn't Yelena said something about maps being unreliable? He's much less interested in the why and much more interested in crouching down and running his hand through the water. It's warm. Nothing at all like the icy Arctic waters that had closed in over his head. That had been terrifying. He'd felt so desperate. This doesn't feel like that at all — and of course, why would it? It's just a river.
A pretty inviting river. And he's tired. He's tired, because he's stuck here, in a place where Tony is alive and where Bucky doesn't want to be Bucky, where the people he knows are different and he feels out of step, like he's been given a second chance but he's still out of sync with it. He still feels very alone. But that's how it's supposed to be, right? He always ends up alone.
At least this time, the water's warm, he thinks, as he leans closer, and closer. It's really so inviting. He could just… slip in. Then he wouldn't have to think about apocalypses or infinity stones or Natasha or Tony or…
I need a goddamn drink
After Dogtown, Steve does something… well. It's not stupid, really. It's normal to want a drink right? And hey, drinks even work on him these days, supposedly. So he's just going to test it. For science.
And maybe to forget that awful river. And the Arctic. And - everything. Just a little. Just bury it under a buzz. Just for a little while.
He finds a bar — something the locals seem to favor, something casual and laid-back and where his limited budget (and palate) is well suited. He orders a couple drinks. And then he orders a few more.
When he finally steps out the door, headed for home, it's late and he's definitely the floaty kind of buzzed. Not falling-down drunk — apparently his big-but-not-enhanced physique can hold its liquor like a true Irishman — but he feels… good. Ish. Better? Kind of. Good enough that it takes him a while to actually make his way back, to the ADI housing, to get up the stairs, to fumble with his keys outside his door. He's still a respectful roommate, somehow, beelining for his room and maybe only hits his shin once or twice if the apartment is dark. The cursing will be quiet.
Time for a train ride
Steve shows up at the station as requested, bag slung over his shoulder. When they get on board, he takes a seat by the window and plunks the bag down by his feet (it makes an odd, heavy, almost metallic sound when he does). He mostly spends the trip alternately watching the landscape go by and checking on Winter, sometimes getting snacks from the dining car for one or both of them. Anyone seated near him might get offered a bite or two, if they look interested.
While he doesn't manage to get caught between the cars, he's definitely by the window when they go through the tunnel. When the tapping starts, he tries to get closer, not back away (like a reasonable person). Still, he can't make anything out by the time the lights flicker back on.
His seat means he also sees the burned bodies; he doesn't know what to think about that, but anyone sitting next to him will get a nudge as he asks, "Do you see that?" Of course, when you look… there's nothing to see. And when he looks back, it's gone.
When: First half of May
Where: Prompts include Dogtown (Rivertouched), a random bar/the streets of Gloucester, and the train,. You can also catch him at ADI or in his apartment/around the ADI housing building, or hit me up if you have other ideas!
Summary: Steve has been here for a month and still feels like he's a little adrift. He doesn't like it. He takes the mission in Dogtown, then "investigates" some local haunts (i.e., bars) to try to relax, and boards the train with the rest of his colleagues for whatever lies ahead.
Warnings: supernatural compulsion, hallucination, suicidal ideation and drowning (past and potentially present) drinking/drunkenness, nyctophobia, burns/dead bodies
It's better than the Arctic
His conversation with Yelena shortly after arriving had piqued Steve's interest in Dogtown, so when the opportunity arises to check it out for himself, he takes it. Sure, he's got the ADI-issued GPS in his pocket, but he sure as hell doesn't plan on using it. (Maybe he'll change his mind. We'll see.)
All he's got to record with is his phone and he knows how to use it, but frankly he's more interested in simply finding out what's up with this place than actually documenting anything or earning any reward. He won't outright abandon his partner, of course, but they must have taken different paths back at the fork, because now he's standing at the edge of a river that he doesn't… think was on the map he'd looked up, but hadn't Yelena said something about maps being unreliable? He's much less interested in the why and much more interested in crouching down and running his hand through the water. It's warm. Nothing at all like the icy Arctic waters that had closed in over his head. That had been terrifying. He'd felt so desperate. This doesn't feel like that at all — and of course, why would it? It's just a river.
A pretty inviting river. And he's tired. He's tired, because he's stuck here, in a place where Tony is alive and where Bucky doesn't want to be Bucky, where the people he knows are different and he feels out of step, like he's been given a second chance but he's still out of sync with it. He still feels very alone. But that's how it's supposed to be, right? He always ends up alone.
At least this time, the water's warm, he thinks, as he leans closer, and closer. It's really so inviting. He could just… slip in. Then he wouldn't have to think about apocalypses or infinity stones or Natasha or Tony or…
I need a goddamn drink
After Dogtown, Steve does something… well. It's not stupid, really. It's normal to want a drink right? And hey, drinks even work on him these days, supposedly. So he's just going to test it. For science.
And maybe to forget that awful river. And the Arctic. And - everything. Just a little. Just bury it under a buzz. Just for a little while.
He finds a bar — something the locals seem to favor, something casual and laid-back and where his limited budget (and palate) is well suited. He orders a couple drinks. And then he orders a few more.
When he finally steps out the door, headed for home, it's late and he's definitely the floaty kind of buzzed. Not falling-down drunk — apparently his big-but-not-enhanced physique can hold its liquor like a true Irishman — but he feels… good. Ish. Better? Kind of. Good enough that it takes him a while to actually make his way back, to the ADI housing, to get up the stairs, to fumble with his keys outside his door. He's still a respectful roommate, somehow, beelining for his room and maybe only hits his shin once or twice if the apartment is dark. The cursing will be quiet.
Time for a train ride
Steve shows up at the station as requested, bag slung over his shoulder. When they get on board, he takes a seat by the window and plunks the bag down by his feet (it makes an odd, heavy, almost metallic sound when he does). He mostly spends the trip alternately watching the landscape go by and checking on Winter, sometimes getting snacks from the dining car for one or both of them. Anyone seated near him might get offered a bite or two, if they look interested.
While he doesn't manage to get caught between the cars, he's definitely by the window when they go through the tunnel. When the tapping starts, he tries to get closer, not back away (like a reasonable person). Still, he can't make anything out by the time the lights flicker back on.
His seat means he also sees the burned bodies; he doesn't know what to think about that, but anyone sitting next to him will get a nudge as he asks, "Do you see that?" Of course, when you look… there's nothing to see. And when he looks back, it's gone.
no subject
So, instead, he points out that,] I'm not complaining. I'm drunk. I think. Huh.
[Like he's just finally noticed this state of affairs for himself.
Still, he's following Tony, trying to keep an eye out, too. He's... going to be better at wildly swinging at anything they encounter. He won't be the one to see it first. Definitely not while he has to listen to and make sense of Tony at the same time.]
What did you think it'd be like? [he asks, almost sullenly.] This isn't fun for you?
no subject
[ Is Steve pouting? Tony can hear him pouting. ]
And I didn't think you'd be all Captain Crankypants, either. It absolutely kills the vibe, y'know. So you gonna tell me about that river in Dogtown already or what?
[ Translation: I care about you and you were clearly drinking for Sad Reasons, so I'm worried. Tell me what's wrong already so I can help you. ]
no subject
Although now it's Steve's turn to pout.] I told you, right? There was a river and it wanted me.
So I went in. It was... bad.
[Except it had seemed nice at the time. Maybe that's the worst part.]
I'm fucking done with rivers. And oceans. No more water.
[That may or may not be enough to make the little "Hey, Steve has drowned or nearly drowned at least twice before" light bulb go off in Tony's head. Granted, he wasn't there for either time.]
no subject
Yeah, got that part, Sunshine. It's the 'wanting you' bit that's throwing me off. I mean, any sentient being and I'd totally get it, but bodies of water typically aren't...that.
[ Is it a little more fun to flirt with Steve when he's drunk? Maybe. Also, you have no idea the sort of internal battle he's waging against the urge to make puns about 'thirsting' right now. Or 'cruising'. This is semi-serious business here. ]
no subject
[And that's terrifying, Tony. It's terrifying, to be coerced. How do you fight that?]
no subject
And how'd it do that?
[ He asks the question in a simple and nonjudgmental way, just guiding Steve along. ]
cw: very very vague suicidal ideation
[More arm-waving - actually, his hand clips the nearest building and,] Ow. Fuck.
[Normally, that'd hurt the brick a lot more than it would hurt him.
He frowns back at Tony. A nonjudgemental Tony is almost weirder than a judgemental one.] How does anything work around here? It just... seemed like a nice place. Somewhere I wanted to be. I don't know why. I was just - tired.
I was tired, [he repeats, more softly. He doesn't sound like he just means physically.] It made me remember that.
[It had gotten in his head and made him think about how things were actually not that great here in a lot of respects. How things have not been great for a long time. How just... stopping would be so nice.]
no subject
[ Tony? Judgmental? Come on Steve, give him a little more credit than that. This is your mental health we’re dealing with here, not a ridiculously outdated pair of chinos you’re wearing. And what Steve admits next is particularly concerning, though Tony does his best to play it cool. ]
Right, well, when we’re tired we lie down. Like you’re about to do, on my couch, on your side so you don’t do a Hendrix on me. We don’t contemplate drowning ourselves no matter how fine the water is.
[ Tony keeps his hand on Steve’s arm as they near the apartments, as if there’s a river running alongside them that Steve is threatening to cannonball into right the fuck now.
And yes, Tony knows that Steve doesn’t just mean physically. He’d insist that Steve crash on his couch as opposed to going home even without the possibility of boinking roommates. ]
no subject
Then he frowns over at Tony.] I'm not supposed to lie down. Not ever.
[His voice is quiet. Contemplative, suddenly. Almost... worried?
He also leans against Tony's guiding touch, though, and doesn't try to wave his arms anymore or veer off course.
Of course, his filter is still a bit gone, so he finally has to open his mouth and comment on the last part:] I wasn't contemplating drowning. The first time. In the plane.
It's just what happened.